What the fuck can I say about this mother fucker? 80's cheese? sure. But with some great writing and sweet art. Booster Gold is Michael Carter from the 25th Century. A former All-Everything quarterback for Gotham University, Booster had it all, potentially. But Booster lived most of his life in poverty, as his father had gambled away the family's life savings and then left afterward. Carter's mom and sister were all he had, and they lived in the ghetto. His only way out, make the big time through professional football. And he would have, if he could have just waited till he left school for the pros. But Michael's mother's health was failing, and without an operation, a very costly operation done in zero gravity, she was a goner. So Booster took on with the organized crime racket and started shaving points. He vowed never to throw a game, just make things work for those guys with crooked noses. And he got busted. Guess what kids, crime doesn't pay. Unless you're an "elected" official. Cause, then it pays up the ass. Thrown out of school and his professional status pretty much less than zero, Carter left home and took up a menial job as a night watchman of the Metropolis History Museum. With security bot, Skeets at his side, Booster recognized and incredible opportunity, steal some relics and travel back in time to become a super hero. A super hero with mega endorsement deals and movie contracts. He reprogrammed Skeets and did the deed.
Showcase Presents Booster Gold volume one is over 600 pages of "are you fucking kidding me?" But it's awesome. It didn't come highly recommended by my comic book dealer, as he reads everything that isn't television or movie related that comes into his shop (he did speak highly of Ambush Bug volume 1 though), but I decided to take a chance. I mean 600 plus pages for under twenty bucks is pretty fucking sweet. Especially if I enjoy the fuck out of it. AND I DID! For the most part Booster Gold was written with pencils by Dan "The Death of Superman" Jurgens and mostly having been inked by Mike DeCarlo, this tomb was amazing. So much better than volume one of Showcase Presents Green Lantern. Probably because it took place in the seriously fucked up 1980's instead of the seriously whacked out 1950's where every woman was supposed to be June Fucking Cleaver, but for some reason had a hardon for being married, even when they were an heiress to a multi-million dollar aircraft company (stupid bitch). i had fun the whole way through this ride. Jurgens knows how to craft a compelling story about an extremely vapid and superficial character. And some of the plot twists... totally fucked up.
The best part of the book had to be, straight man Skeets. Providing his knowledge of the verbal vernacular of the times to the woahfully wordless-smith Gold was hilarious. Correcting all of his misuses of 80's slang was hilarious. And it seriously rocked cause in my head I was hearing the voice of Skeets from the Justice League Unlimited cartoon who was voiced by Billy West (Futurama) while I read. And even though I was not reading comics in the 80's, this book definitely encompassed the idea of the 80's. Especially if you compare it to Brett Easton Ellis' American Psycho. There was a lot of materialism involved. Money grubbing and fame seeking, Booster Gold provided laughs, cheers, boos and even some sympathy along the way. His story reads like that of so many inner city youth who's only possible escape from poverty are sports, or illegal means. And in Gold's case, it turned out to be a little of both.
Booster Gold volume one had guest stars galore. The Legion of Superheroes made an appearance as Booster Gold tried to save the president from an assassination attempt. The Teen Titans, or at least Donna Troy showed up for like one fucking panel. Batman, Robin, Superman and the mid 80's incarnation of the Justice League showed up, which included Martian Manhunter, Blue Beetle, Rocket Red, a seriously 80's version of Black Canary and Guy Gardner, with amnesia. But it could have not had any of these other characters, and just included perrenial mort, Rainbow Raider, which was an awesome story by the way and an android Booster, which wouldn't have worked without Superman, and the Dimension X crew.
Honestly I do not know what the fuck I was expecting from this book, but I got more than I bargained for and I now include Booster Gold and Skeets among my favorite characters. Gold sought to be a super hero for all the wrong reasons, fame and money. But he ended up being a super hero none the less. With that, I give Showcase Presents Booster Gold volume 1 a train wreck of a debut as its grade; as it also included his first appearance and origin stories. In 1993, in ECW a wrestler debuted who was so unorthodox that the wrestling world was forever changed. "The most homicidal, suicidal, genocidal maniac known to man" appeared in the ECW Arena. Bound to a dolly with a chain, with his mouth covered like Hannibal Lecter, Sabu emerged. Throwing chairs and attacking fans, the man who was considered revolutionary among his peers, but never saw the coin he deserved, made his mark on American soil. Sabu went head to head with the relatively new wrestler, The Tazmaniac (Taz) in a match that saw slingshot leg drops, suicide dive planchas and Asai Moonsaults. In his ECW debut, under the guidance of manager hunter Q. Robins III and with his handler, 911, Sabu defeated Taz, the man he would eventually win the ECW tag team titles with, and main even the very first ECW pay per view against. "The human highlight reel of professional wrestling," and whirling dervish of the squared circle cemented his place in the annals of professional wrestling.
Showing posts with label death of superman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label death of superman. Show all posts
Friday, November 4, 2011
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Superman Doomsday: A Hardcore Review
I am going to remind everyone who reads these reviews that the grading system I use is this: instead of thumbs up or stars, I rate on hardcore moments in pro wrestling history. The more hardcore the event, match, promo or moment the more I liked the book, comic, movie or video game I am reviewing. The less hardcore the moment, the more I disliked it. An example would be anything related to Hulk Hogan would be highly NOT recommended. Onto the review...
Into it holds the idea that we should be fair and balanced and be "nice" and not be damning of a product or its creators. I say this. It would not be truth if I only reviewed things I liked or always in a favorable way. In fact the reviews where I have panned something have brought me the most kudos from readers. And quite simply, if you do not like things to reviewed fairly and in an editorial manner... DON'T FUCKING READ MY REVIEWS! In fact if that's how you feel you should probably never read anything I write... EVAR!
Wow! That's about the nicest thing you're gonna get from this reviewer. The animation (as in the movement of characters) was good. But the redesigning of classic characters, Clark/Superman, Lois, Lex and Jimmy Olsen where unexpected and not welcome. In fact they were quite fucking distracting. Why does Kal El suddenly have cheekbones and massive laugh lines? Why does Lois suddenly look like she's Puerto Rican? And why does Jimmy Olsen look like a metrosexual fag? Not that I'm knocking anything ethnic or homosexual. I just want to know, why you took characters that were so solidly defined, visually, and auditorally and FUCK THEM UP?! Plus Lex Luthor's looking more like a chemo patient then he usually looks. And suddenly Mercy isn't a baddass cheuffer and more. And she's not a brunette either.
This movie was wrought with fucking attrocities from the jump. Why would you have "celebrities" come in and voice these iconic sounding characters too. I say "celebrities," cause having Anne Heche do her fucking Bells Palsey voice for Lois and Adam Baldwin do the shittacular voicing of Superman made my asshole pucker for 90 minutes. Adam Baldwin. Jesus, he's like lower on the food chain than Stephen Baldwin. And does Anne Heche always sound like a stroke victim? And who gives a fuck that Buffy's Spike did Lex Luthor's voice. It didn't matter. And if James Marsters, Anne Heche and Adam Baldwin are supposed to be selling points to this movie, then I'm glad I got it at Bookmans and they have a "no hassle return policy." Cause not only should I return this, but I should also burn the dvd with a lighter so it will never play again.
The idea that Doomsday was just from some pre-Christ timeline embedded in the earth, and not from Krypton, and already evolved to his Supes killing form was preposterous. I know. All you fuckers are gonna come out with, but that's too long a story to do in 90 minutes. Well, my answer is simpler than even that. "THEN DON'T DO IT!"
The idea that people come with suggestions that it's not realistic to do that story. I say this. It's a fucking cartoon and if it's easy to do it in a comic book, then it's almost as easy to do it in a cartoon. And I got my degree in animation so don't try and shine away from the issue.
This was a fucking ludicrous idea to even try this storyline if you weren't dedicated to do it right.
And this is another shot I am gonna take. Because as a reviewer I am not out to blow sunshine off anyone's ass or make friends. I am here to give my fucking opinion on the matter at hand. Bruce Timm should be appologizing to everyone who's viewed this movie, much less shelled out their money for it in a capacity where they can't return it. I refuse to appologize for my opinions. However if it is the case that you require an appology to continue this and other aticles, that here you go.... "I'm sorry that you made an inferior product and that you attempted to pass it off as a success or good. I'm also sorry that you the viewer had to see this abortion. And I'm even sorrier that you liked it and might be spiteful of my opinions on the matter at hand. I am a creator and an artist. And it is thusly my responsibility to provoke a response. That's what an artist does. That's what are is. And if you don't understand that or don't accept that, than I am sorry you're a narrow minded FUCK who has no sense of humor and or is unable to accept new ideas. And if that is the case, than I am also sorry you were "elected" president of the United States, Geroge W. Bush.
And with that I will curry my verdict.... err grade for this monumental mistake. This piece of shite garners one of the worst things to ever hit a WWE wrestling ring. And that's saying something. This is Vince McMahon coming up with the gimmick of Nick Dinsmore, and accomplished wrestler being reduced to being retarded on camera. Quite literally. Nick Dinsmore was given the gimmick of being Eric Bischoff's nephew, Eugene, complete with inside out jacket, and perenially having a note pinned to said jacket. Eugene was also given the duty of having "crazy retard strength." Some people might say that developmentally disabled people would be inspired in having themselves represented on screen. I say this, if you're going to have a particular community "represented" in the wrestling business, then have them represent themselves. Hire and train a person with Cognative Disabilty or Down Syndrome play the part. Don't condascend to me and play the lowest common denominator card. Cause all that will do is eventually make people change the channel. The character was given a finally hardcore exit, when at One Night Stand 2006, he was caned to near death by the ECW fan favorite, Sandman.
Into it holds the idea that we should be fair and balanced and be "nice" and not be damning of a product or its creators. I say this. It would not be truth if I only reviewed things I liked or always in a favorable way. In fact the reviews where I have panned something have brought me the most kudos from readers. And quite simply, if you do not like things to reviewed fairly and in an editorial manner... DON'T FUCKING READ MY REVIEWS! In fact if that's how you feel you should probably never read anything I write... EVAR!
Wow! That's about the nicest thing you're gonna get from this reviewer. The animation (as in the movement of characters) was good. But the redesigning of classic characters, Clark/Superman, Lois, Lex and Jimmy Olsen where unexpected and not welcome. In fact they were quite fucking distracting. Why does Kal El suddenly have cheekbones and massive laugh lines? Why does Lois suddenly look like she's Puerto Rican? And why does Jimmy Olsen look like a metrosexual fag? Not that I'm knocking anything ethnic or homosexual. I just want to know, why you took characters that were so solidly defined, visually, and auditorally and FUCK THEM UP?! Plus Lex Luthor's looking more like a chemo patient then he usually looks. And suddenly Mercy isn't a baddass cheuffer and more. And she's not a brunette either.
This movie was wrought with fucking attrocities from the jump. Why would you have "celebrities" come in and voice these iconic sounding characters too. I say "celebrities," cause having Anne Heche do her fucking Bells Palsey voice for Lois and Adam Baldwin do the shittacular voicing of Superman made my asshole pucker for 90 minutes. Adam Baldwin. Jesus, he's like lower on the food chain than Stephen Baldwin. And does Anne Heche always sound like a stroke victim? And who gives a fuck that Buffy's Spike did Lex Luthor's voice. It didn't matter. And if James Marsters, Anne Heche and Adam Baldwin are supposed to be selling points to this movie, then I'm glad I got it at Bookmans and they have a "no hassle return policy." Cause not only should I return this, but I should also burn the dvd with a lighter so it will never play again.
The idea that Doomsday was just from some pre-Christ timeline embedded in the earth, and not from Krypton, and already evolved to his Supes killing form was preposterous. I know. All you fuckers are gonna come out with, but that's too long a story to do in 90 minutes. Well, my answer is simpler than even that. "THEN DON'T DO IT!"
The idea that people come with suggestions that it's not realistic to do that story. I say this. It's a fucking cartoon and if it's easy to do it in a comic book, then it's almost as easy to do it in a cartoon. And I got my degree in animation so don't try and shine away from the issue.
This was a fucking ludicrous idea to even try this storyline if you weren't dedicated to do it right.
And this is another shot I am gonna take. Because as a reviewer I am not out to blow sunshine off anyone's ass or make friends. I am here to give my fucking opinion on the matter at hand. Bruce Timm should be appologizing to everyone who's viewed this movie, much less shelled out their money for it in a capacity where they can't return it. I refuse to appologize for my opinions. However if it is the case that you require an appology to continue this and other aticles, that here you go.... "I'm sorry that you made an inferior product and that you attempted to pass it off as a success or good. I'm also sorry that you the viewer had to see this abortion. And I'm even sorrier that you liked it and might be spiteful of my opinions on the matter at hand. I am a creator and an artist. And it is thusly my responsibility to provoke a response. That's what an artist does. That's what are is. And if you don't understand that or don't accept that, than I am sorry you're a narrow minded FUCK who has no sense of humor and or is unable to accept new ideas. And if that is the case, than I am also sorry you were "elected" president of the United States, Geroge W. Bush.
And with that I will curry my verdict.... err grade for this monumental mistake. This piece of shite garners one of the worst things to ever hit a WWE wrestling ring. And that's saying something. This is Vince McMahon coming up with the gimmick of Nick Dinsmore, and accomplished wrestler being reduced to being retarded on camera. Quite literally. Nick Dinsmore was given the gimmick of being Eric Bischoff's nephew, Eugene, complete with inside out jacket, and perenially having a note pinned to said jacket. Eugene was also given the duty of having "crazy retard strength." Some people might say that developmentally disabled people would be inspired in having themselves represented on screen. I say this, if you're going to have a particular community "represented" in the wrestling business, then have them represent themselves. Hire and train a person with Cognative Disabilty or Down Syndrome play the part. Don't condascend to me and play the lowest common denominator card. Cause all that will do is eventually make people change the channel. The character was given a finally hardcore exit, when at One Night Stand 2006, he was caned to near death by the ECW fan favorite, Sandman.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
