Whip It; A Hardcore Review

"What are you doing in five and half minutes?"
The tagline for this movie is "Be your own hero." More appropriate words for this current neopolitical/ pop culture driven climate could not be more spot on.

Bliss Cavendar (Ellen Page) is your run of the mill small town Texas misfit teen with no real aspirations of life other than placating her mom who happens to be taken with beauty pageants and cotillions. Bliss, along with "help" from her best friend, Pash, she appears at the pageant with blue hair to answer the question, "If you could eat dinner with anyone who would it be?" Bliss and Pash work side by side along with Birdman, their classmate and new shift supervisor at their waitressing gig. Pash has applied to Ivy League colleges, while Bliss kinda just doesn't really know who she is or what she wants from life. Having little passion for her future, Bliss goes shoping in nearby Austin with her mom and little sister. The shopping excursion turns into something more when Bliss runs across some local roller derby girls who skate for the team, The Hurl Scouts. Concocting a beautiful scheme with bff Pash, Bliss is out to "support her high school team," on an away game in Austin. Bliss reveres the girls of the Hurl Scouts, despite their losing effort. Claiming her new heroes in the Hurl Scouts to skater, Maggie Mayhem, Bliss is told, "Well put on some skates. Be your own hero."
Armed with a gut full of determination and "Barbie" skates, Bliss tries out for the TXRD. She's smaller and thusly faster than any girl on the track. Picked by coach, Razor, Bliss joins the Hurl Scouts, TXRD's Bad News Bears, with one exception. They're hot, lovable losers. And they just don't care. Lead by Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig), Smashly Simpson (Drew Berrymore), Rosa Sparks (hip hop artist Eve) and the doubly deaf Manson Sisters, Bliss is rechristened "Babe Ruthless," the team's newest "jammer." For the roller derby newb, a jammer is the person who scores points for their team, by completing revolutions of the track while passing members of the opposing team. Teammates provide blocking to enable scoring from the jammer. Physical contact is not only necessary it is wholly encouraged, cheered and fucking expected. Babe's problem is her unwanting to take a hit or make physical contact. Being pushed by rival Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis) Babe is forced to become well Ruthless.
The movie is about finding out who you are and going after it. It's about respecting where you come from, but not allowing that to hinder who you might become. The great thing about this movie is that a lot of actual roller derby girls worked on its production. It was also Drew Berrymore's directorial debut. And to be honest, I had my doubts about the film's legitimacy when I found that out. But after seeing how passionate these women are about what they do. Without big money contracts, endorsements top quality facilities to practice or play in, and the way society looks at them, I have so much more respect not only for the sport as a whole, but the women as individuals and their friendships and families that grow from roller derby.
What makes the experience of watching this movie even more special for me is that prior to watching it I was drinking down at the Surly Wench Pub here in Tucson and it was following a huge intercity roller derby bout. To see these women in person and the fun, and caring they have for each other after the bout is over. The people you travel down the road we all call life together become your friends, your road dogs. People you would go to bat for.
As I have stated before in my reviews, my position of being a fan of professional wrestling, most notably ECW in the years of 1994-2001, I dig the hardcore moments that encompass true battle and courage. That being said, if I review something and grade it with more than a short passing reference to Hulk Hogan I FUCKING HATED IT! And it's my blog and if you're reading it then I guess you enjoy my thoughts, have similar feelings or just like backlashing humor. However, in today's review Hulk Hogan will not be a factor. Thank god. I fucking hate that bastard. Whip It is about passion for what you do, and finding out who you really are. And in a one liner that truly matters, "being your own hero." What I came up with after some heavy thought is the tag team match from "One Night Stand" 2006 pitting newly self anointed co Hardcore Champions Mick Foley and Edge versus any two scumbags from the ECW locker room. Those scumbags just happened to be the "Innovator of Violence" Tommy Dreamer and "The Living Legend" Terry Funk. Funk was 62 when this match happened. Which is twenty plus years older than Foley. Tommy provided most of his team's offense and time in the ring. But when Funk got a hold of his opponents he let them have it. And a 62 year old punch from Terry Funk is probably a lot like a forty-something punch from Terry Funk, "stiff." During the course of the match, Funk had trauma to his eye and had to be rushed from ring side. All the while Tommy Dreamer took the brunt of the new hardcore duo. Funk returned ten minutes later through the crowd, complete with bloody head bandage and insanely over sized 2X4 wrapped in barbed wire. When he gets to the ring, Beulah helps him light the damn thing on fire. He then starts wailing away on Mick Foley with it and then dives into Foley taking both men off the ring apron and into a large piece of plywood covered in barbed wire. And the crowd at the Hammerstein Ballroom in the Manhattan Center thundered E C W! E C W!