Catwoman Selina's Big Score; A Hardcore Review *SPOILERS*

Darwyn Cooke, the mind behind Justice League New Frontier and the relaunch of the Silver Age DC characters hits up Catwoman's door. And believe it or not, this tale only has about six pages with Selina dressed as Catwoman. Now before I continue, I am a fan of Catwoman and a lot of female characters. As I myself am striving to have quality characters in my comics, most of whom are female. There's not a whole lot about this book that I liked. I'm not a big fan of Cooke's art style in this piece. I've seen other stuff he's done that I enjoy, but this just felt sloppy and rushed. And that's fine if there are panels or even pages that seem that way, but not the whole book. I get that the pace was supposed to be fast, as it was a heist story. But there are things that need to be fast and other things that need to be paced better. You can have a fast paced story and still have detail in your work. It just seemed that Cooke glossed over a lot of the essential details in the whole Catwoman mythos. First, she's a loner. She doesn't work well with others. And that doesn't mean a lack of a supporting cast, it means she doesn't have a team. But for some reason, it was necessary to have members she worked with, including an inside girl, who was fucking Falcone, literally. This woman worked the streets as a high priced hooker, in order to support her child and her mother? I don't get it. Is that supposed to purvey a strong female character? I don't know. I have been told my female characters are not strong females, cause they are not typical female roles. I accept the critique. But it's 2010, I don't feel tradition gender roles really apply to being a strong female character other than having a vagina and ovaries.
Anyways, as with movies and animation there's a thing called pacing. And I don't feel this book hit the mark with one exception. The ACTUAL heist. It was six pages of pure, seriously break neck pacing. And the artwork helped immensely with that. Cooke laid out those pages beautifully, all in a double page spread format that showed off multiple facets of the action going on.
But then the main premise of the story in Selina Kyle, showing up after apparently offing herself, as Catwoman and most people believing her dead. So, Catwoman had hung up her whip and ears for a bit in order to get her self back on track. And she needed a big score to make that happen. So she reaches out to her hooker friend, Chantaal, who gets iced in the process. And then bumps uglies with a guy who's old enough to be her grandfather. I get the whole idea, younger, hot woman, older guy. But c'mon, the core fanboys are between the ages of 18 and 35. I don't know how many of them wanna see Catwoman, who I can safely say most of us have had sexual fantasies about bangin' Moses. Cause, there's a lot of things in this world that aren't sexy. And a hot chick banging an old guy is one of them. Liver spots, denture cream and condoms DO NOT belong together.
It is also apparent by this tale, that Selina is not a very strong woman if she's staking claim to guys over and over. Cause this book also begins (I think) the relationship between her and Slam Bradley, the ancient father of her child. She's got a bat and geriatric fetish.
In that, after the big score, pretty much everyone ends up dead, except Selina and Slam. And there's fucking sexual tension between them. Directly after people get their heads shot off. All this from the guy who helped relaunch the DC Silver Age and re-established Catwoman. I mean he did the writing and art for the first few issue of the relaunch back in the early 2000's. And it was excellent. This however, was like canned cat food. Moist, smelly and probably tastes bad if you eat it.
I give this grade not a specific moment in hardcore (or more accurately, lack there of) wrestling history, but more of a belief structure one man has about the business. Wrestlers have to be big. And when I say big, I'm not just talking about their size, but also their lack of talent and ability in the ring and on the mic. The most current example we are forced to tivo through is The Great Khali, Dalip Singh. I am sure he is a real sweetheart and a good guy, but for the love of Will Eisner (God) get him the fuck off of my television screen. From his lackadaisical punches and bogus finishing move, The Khali Vise Grip, a double handed skull crush, to the way he walks. The man has no spine. And I don't mean that in the figurative sense, but the literal sense. It looks like all of his vertebrae are fused. Making his walk look very awkward and painful. I think they even had subtitles for a while when he gave promos, cause he sounds like he has a large cock in his mouth when he speaks. And this is not an attack on a foreigner, I could have just as easily picked super sized disappointments like Mark Henry, The Avalanche, Earthquake or Giant Gonzales. I chose Khali, cause well he's current and he sucks.